So, I think my quest to become more organized was a result of the realization that I am in fact an adult with sh*t to do. For what it’s worth, I started the bullet journal and it’s been super helpful. It doesn’t actually get anything done, that still is all internally motivated; but at least I can clearly see what items on my to-do list are being ignored and what goals I’m tracking that are being woefully neglected. (But in all seriousness, I highly recommend it).
And after way too much introspection, I’ve realized that I am in fact a “grown-up” technically. I mean, I’m a twenty-something business-owner. It’s not that I’m afraid of thirty (it’s still too far away for that), but I’m definitely more aware of it (it’s not that far off either). But I also feel emboldened. I’m a twenty-something business-owner. Sure, it’s more accurate to say I’m a paperwork-plagued artist, but still. It counts. And if I can do that, which I never would have thought possible even this time last year, then what’s to say what is or isn’t possible this time next year?
I guess in a way I don’t want to be an adult by technicality alone. I want to own it. More than that, I want to mold it and define how I choose to experience it. I think we all do that, certainly, but right now I’m acutely aware it’s an option. This is too positive to be mistaken for an identity crisis. It’s more like a set of resolutions that resulted from the hibernation of winter to be revealed with the fresh air of spring! Why should the Gregorian calendar have all the fun, anyway?
I want more gratitude, more joy, and laughter. I want to be a good hostess, and a great friend. I want to be more organized, less afraid, and a better listener. I want to live each day aware of grace, beauty and sunshine, even if I can’t always see it. I don’t want to worry about perfection, or perfection…or perfection…
It’s definitely a work in progress.